Category Archives: Andy

If you’re looking for something to listen to tonight, and you happen to be as obsessed with cars and automobiles as Andy is, tune in to WRPI tonight (you can listen online here) when Andy will be joining ‘Rockin’ Ray’s Retro Roadtrip’ for some serious auto talk. Dr. Ray is a dear friend of ours, and his wealth of knowledge touches on just about every topic you can imagine. His car expertise, however, knows no equal, with the possible exception of Andy.

When these two get going on discussing automobiles, it’s something to behold. Tonight, should you wish to accept this online invitation, you are welcome to eavesdrop on the fun. (And yes, that time frame is correct – it’s going until 2 AM.) Not sure how long Andy will go, but he’s up beyond that every night so I know he can do it, and since he can’t get this kind of talk at home, he will likely be in his element. Here’s the promo piece from their FaceBook page:

Attention all car lovers, enthusiasts, and anyone who has ever owned, driven, or ridden in a motor vehicle!! This Wednesday night, a landmark broadcast will be presented on WRPI 91.5 fm between 6:00 pm and 2:00 am Eastern Time.

Join Dr. Ray, Andy, Bill, Todd, Sean, and exciting callers from all around the world for this marathon radio special, featuring everything related to the automobile from muscle cars to the family station wagon, and everything in between!

Replete with rich anecdotes, pop culture, and every car song you ever sang along to with the top down, ROCKIN’ RAY’S RETRO ROADTRIP will make your engine roar!!!

Listen live on WRPI 91.5 fm (in upstate New York), on our live worldwide webstream at www.wrpi.org/listen, or via whichever music/ radio app you use on your smartphone.

What did we do in the days before Grindr or Tinder or Match? How did we meet people before social media put everyone in our backyard – hell, in our bedrooms and bathrooms? Having met my husband a decade and a half ago, I remember the days before our computers or cel phones opened a portal to the world.

Back then we didn’t have instant access to like-minded individuals who shared our love of Madonna. We couldn’t easily connect with or identify those who had a similar obsession with Blanche’s bathrobes on ‘The Golden Girls‘. We had to rely solely on the tricky touch of destiny and luck, putting blind faith in some greater unseen power, trusting that love would find its way into our lives. The chance encounter in the subway, the random run-in in a grocery store, the incidental meeting in a bar, or the casual introduction by a friend – these were the haphazard ways we stumbled upon love in the olden days.

That’s not to say that there aren’t wonderful and lucky couples who have met online and through social sites. And part of me, the cynical, cold, analytical and pragmatic part – feels the best way to have a lasting relationship is to find someone you’re perfectly compatible with and take the difficulties out of compromise and arguments.

Yet the other part of me, the hidden romantic, the guy who believes in love at first sight and star-crossed lovers and all the co-dependent gooey stuff we’re not supposed to believe in, still thinks there’s a place for destiny.

If I’d had to rely on a dating site to pair me up with Andy, it would never have happened. I would not have checked Cars/Automobiles as an interest. He would not have put Thai as a favorite food. I would have steered clear of anyone having anything to do with the police. He would have avoided anyone who was anxiously waiting for the next Tom Ford Private Blend to be released (‘Venetian Bergamot’ in a few weeks– eek!!!) The point is, based on paper and facts and self-admitted traits, we would never would have met. But love doesn’t work that way. When fate stepped in during the last hours of a rainy Sunday evening fifteen years ago, and I saw Andy across an empty old-fashioned gay bar, it was not something that could have been orchestrated by every single preference we could have fed into a computer.

I think if I’d met someone through one of the social sites, I’d always wonder if it was real. If it was meant to be. If it wasn’t forced or manufactured. Given just how different Andy and I can sometimes be, yes, there are also moments where I wonder if it might be easier. But I wouldn’t change knowing him for anything, and I wouldn’t trade the worlds he’s opened up to me, and vice versa, for the ease of instant compatibility. I’m just weird like that. The best things rarely come easily. They are rich and wondrous and worth the work that destiny requires for such magic.

This post is a gift to my husband, who loves all things to do with cars and automobiles, antique and otherwise. I only know what the last one is, because it sits beside our driveway. As for the other ones, if you’re interested in knowing the make and model and year , you should contact Andy directly. He can talk cars for days, and he knows his shit.

Though they’re not my cup of tea, I can appreciate the artistry of some of the older cars, such as the fancy ones on display at the Saratoga Automobile Museum (of which Andy is unsurprisingly a member).

If he throws in dinner in Saratoga, I’m always game for another visit.

And sometimes, I need look no further than my own front yard to see a car show.

Exactly fifteen years ago tonight, I first met the man who would become my husband. On a rainy day that had suddenly cleared for the evening, I saw him across the room, and we locked hearts before we realized what was happening. As we get older, and our lives align into one, there is a deeper resonance that rings on such occasions. It feels like an accomplishment as much as it feels like any other day. We are lucky and blessed, yet we each have to work at it from time to time. A happy marriage is as much about compromise and work as it is about rainbows and unicorns, yet there is no greater happiness than a shared life.

Once upon a time I felt the need to sing and shout about such things. These days, we enjoy each other on a quieter level, with a deeper understanding, and the wonderful richness of a decade and a half together. Happy Anniversary, Drew!

It was 3 o’clock in the morning, well, the dead of night. The crash was loud, but it happened so quickly I didn’t realize it was that which had woken me. Instead, I heard Andy hurrying down the hallway asking if I was all right. Groggily, I said yes, why? He said there was a huge noise that sounded like I had fallen onto the floor, reminiscent of the time when an ice-coated tree fell and crashed through our roof. I opened my eyes and let them adjust to the light coming from the hallway. Alerted to a concerned tone in Andy’s voice, my mind slowly began to fill with terrifying scenarios.

What if someone had jumped onto the house from a nearby oak tree and was trying to break in? What if two burglars had gotten into a shoving match and ended up pushing each other into the siding? What if someone had been waiting inside the house and was now knocking things over in the attic?

Andy made a search of the front and back yards while I stayed in bed and worried. Eventually he came to bed, but my mind was already running with a multitude of frightening possibilities. What could possibly have made such a crash and left no evidence of itself? I could not get back to sleep. I began asking Andy questions, and then we were both awake. I went through the likely circumstances in my head, stopping in each room. There was a heavy row of shoe shelves in the guest room that once crashed down late at night. I had Andy check that but it was still intact. Maybe the furnace or air conditioner had blown up? Or maybe someone had broken into the basement through one of the tiny windows? Andy checked that too. Which left the attic. There was an extensive unfinished portion of the attic that was over the bedrooms. It sounded to Andy like that was where the crash had come from. He ascended the stairs and turned on the light, but he noticed nothing out of ordinary. Well, almost nothing.

“Do you have something hanging up there?” he asked.

My mind wondered if he meant something like dead bodies and I almost lost it. “Only chains and rope, why? Is there something else there???” [See Christmas Card 2012.]

“No. Everything looks normal.”

I calmed down and went into each room, clicking the lights on, hoping to scare off any would-be intruder watching the house. Andy went back outside to look at the roof from the street. He disappeared behind the front hedge and I thought for sure, this was it. This is when he doesn’t come back, and someone snatches me from behind and everything ends in a bloody mess of ‘Scream’ proportions. I was about to run to the kitchen for a knife when he came back up the walkway.

Locking the door, we headed back to bed, but I stopped in the bathroom on the way. There was an eeriness to an interrupted night of sleep, when suddenly the quietness amplified every tiny moan or creak of the house. I looked down at one of the drawers beneath the sink. It was oddly askew, angled up and no longer in line like the other drawers. I called Andy in to look at it. He fiddled a bit and as he was righting it, it fell back in and made a crash. The same crash that he’d heard earlier.

Then, and only then, could I get back to sleep.

Though Andy and I have been together for almost fifteen years, today only marks our fifth wedding anniversary. (Such is the intricate math necessary from the days leading up to the beginning of marriage equality.) On this date five years ago, Andy and I made our commitment official in a simple but beautiful ceremony in the Boston Public Garden. A recap of links follows for those who haven’t heard about that magical time, and for those of us who want to revisit the happy event:

1. Arrival & Accommodations

2. Rehearsal Dinner

3.  Last Bachelor Night

4. Wedding Day Dawn

5. Wedding Ceremony

6. Wedding Garden

7. Wedding Lunch

8. Wedding Dinner

Happy Birthday to my husband Andy! Many, many years ago a baby came into the world who would change the trajectory of my life for the better. The last fourteen years have been a winding trail of adventure, fun, a little drama, and a lot of love.

He doesn’t get as much of the glory as he deserves on this site, mostly because he is a tad more private than myself (and is notoriously difficult to get to sit still for a photo.) But today is his day, so whether he likes the accolades and acclaim or not, they are his for the taking.

Happy Birthday, Drew ~ and many happy returns of the day!

When people really matter to me, I tend to not make a big deal of them, holding them closer to my heart, and much more quietly. I can make a big hubbub and stink about those who don’t matter, but the ones that do I trust to know enough and not feel slighted. Andy and I have that sort of relationship. It’s not a big bombastic in-your-face show, because it means more than hype and hoopla to us. However, he does have his own category on this site, and I’ve referenced him hundreds of times because he’s a main part of my life, even if I don’t always make a fuss.

Within his category are  number of stories that I’ve written and posted over the years. From the obtaining of a wedding license to a rumination on all that’s happened since the day we met ~ from the wedding ceremony to what being married might really mean ~ from ensuing anniversaries to birthdays in Maine, it’s been a wild and wonderful ride. Here’s to us.