Birthday Suit Mayhem

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A lot of nudity goes on here – nothing full-frontal or all that flagrant, but enough. Of late, though, it hasn’t been me (and you can verify by going through the last few months of posts by clicking the ‘Older Entries’ option barely used or seen in the lower left when you scroll down). That bodes well for the future of this site, in which, despite the name, attention has shifted slightly to other things. For a final birthday post, however, a few more birthday suit shots, per request. Hope you stick around to see how 41 unfolds…

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Birthday-Suited Butt Boy

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My forty-one-year-old ass is ready for its close-up.

Get DeMille on the line and fire up the Isotta-Frascini.

The pool is ready, willing, and able.

I’ve got my birthday suit on, much like last year.

And any other year for that matter.

What are you waiting for?

Jump.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman birthday but never remembers her age. ~ Robert Frost

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Turn to Chapter 41…

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On the occasion of turning forty-one years old, I pause for a moment in the usual parade of revelry and fun for a moment of serious contemplation and consideration.

Just fucking kidding.

I’m forty fucking one!

If there’s a reason for a fuck-festooned post, it’s any birthday after fucking forty.

There’s a certain freedom after that number. Not that last year’s supposed milestone upset me in any real way. I’ve just never been bothered by age – mine or anyone else’s. If anything, I’ve wanted to be older all my life. Granted, there are moments when I wish we were going in reverse. My body doesn’t bounce back as quickly or easily as it once did. I need sleep and rest and can’t imagine staying out much beyond midnight. I need to exercise and watch my dietary intake if I want to dwell between a 31 and 32 inch waist (I may just bite the 32 bullet and call it a day – but there are some pretty 31s that I’m not quite ready to part with.) I’ve also had to re-structure and re-focus on things that matter the most to me.

For the most part, I remain one of the luckiest fucks in the world, living a charmed and enchanted life with some of the greatest family and friends for which a guy could ever ask.

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Hunk of the Day: Luca Lampis

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The Summer Olympics have only been done for a few days, and I’m already in withdrawal. This is French wrestler Luca Lampis, giving a fit spin to the Hunk of the Day and recalling those heady Olympic days of beautiful bodies and athletic prowess. Mr. Lampis certainly exemplifies both. Congrats to him on this first Hunk of the Day honor.

 

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Submitted Without Comment

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Every time I say anything remotely critical of parents and children, some Mom or Dad gets all riled up and defensive, as if I’m attacking their own kid. This time, I’m going to reserve my personal feelings on the matter at hand and simply leave this out for interpretation and private discussion: this double-wide stroller was parked in the middle of a T car the last time I was in Boston. As you can see, it was impossible for anyone wider than 18 inches to pass by it. I genuinely want to know if this is acceptable to others. (I’m not proffering an opinion one way or another, so there’s no need to go crazy on my ass.) What is the best way to travel with such a stroller on public transportation (it didn’t look like it could be folded into a more manageable size)?

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Tom Ford Goes Green

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After his summer re-tread of all things Neroli, Tom Ford is back in my good graces with his trio of new Private Blends. While there are actually four fragrances in the new ‘Les Extraits Verts’ line (Vert d’Encens, Vert de Bois, Vert Bohème and Vert de Fleur), only three are currently available stateside. Here is the literature on the new line, followed my first impressions of the three at hand.

Vert d’Encens ~ “Sophisticated, aromatic and wild, Vert d’Encens is a whole new concept for an incense fragrance, inspired by the rugged Mediterranean coastlines of Corsica. Incense, so long the domain of austere, church-y scents or lavish Middle Eastern fantasias, is combined here with intense green notes and resinous tree sap for a bright, bracing and expressively textured burst of naturalistic character.” With pine resin, tree sap accord, fir balsam, incense, heliotrope and boxtree oil.

Vert de Bois ~ “Unique and provocative, Vert des Bois represents a new evolution for green scents- a refreshingly avant-garde combination of woods, aromatics and florals as distinct as it is versatile.” With spiked ouzo accord, poplar buds, olive tree leaves, lentisque resinoid, roasted tonka and patchouli.

Vert Bohème ~ “Fresh, green and entirely free spirited, Vert Bohème sparkles like an emerald on the finger of a dynamic young artist idling away a sunlit afternoon.” With galbanum, mandarin, magnolia, honeysuckle, violet leaf and gustavia superba.

Vert de Fleur ~ “Private Blend Vert de Fleur strikes an alluring note on the definitive theme of 70s glamour. Refined with a modern flourish of iris and hyacinth, Vert de Fleur is Tom Ford’s floral subversion of classic green and captures an exuberant scene where beautiful icons with inimitable personas uncover a new world of pleasure.” Additional notes include galbanum, neroli, bergamot, basil, jasmine, rose, orange blossom, vetiver, patchouli and oakmoss.

As mentioned, the Fleur is not yet available here, and it sounds little too floral for my liking anyway, so on with the three Verts that held the most promise. I’ll begin with my least-liked to most-loved, with samples provided by the lovely Ann at Neiman Marcus (the stingy associates at the Boston Saks Fifth Avenue only allowed me two of the three samples, in spite of all the bottles I’ve purchased there).

  • Vert Bohème is quite floral itself, and as such it turned a little too sweetly for my taste. It also had little to no staying power, a sin when attached to such a price point.
  • Vert de Bois is reminiscent of the defunct Italian Cypress, with a pervading jolt of patchouli that’s not at all offensive in that sweaty 60′s way. There’s an interesting mid-section in which it dries down to a powerful twin of Thierry Mugler’s popular Angel, before dissipating into something more subtle. The opening is a little too chemical for my taste, but the pine does its best to temper it, and in the end is successful.
  • Vert d’Encens is the Tom Ford Private Blend I’ve been waiting for since the luscious Plum Japonais. This incense-like dark prism of gorgeousness smolders with a smoky edge – echoes of the amazing Amber Absolute are in subtle effect – but it is softened with an unlikely violet thread of heliotrope, lending it further jewel tones and sparkle. As an early birthday present, I bought this one for myself. Sometimes something so beautiful demands such self-indulgence.
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Hunk of the Day: Lewis Bloor

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British television star Lewis Bloor, lately of ‘The Only Way is Essex’ and ‘Celebrity Big Brother’, is the Hunk of the Day. His exhibitionist streaks and full-frontal nude peeks have put him front and center of the Twitterverse and FaceBook Kingdom. His naked ass is below, just keep scrolling.

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Banned by… Primark?

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The annoying, obnoxious little kid in me (who takes up far more space than I’d like to admit) just wants to yell ‘Ooooh! I’m so hurt by this!! WAH-WAH!!!’ but the adult in me would like to seriously address the fact that the Primark store in Boston has banned ALANILAGAN.com from its WiFi access.

This is not a pornographic site, despite what your research or online filters indicate. There is no full-frontal nudity and there are absolutely no depictions of sexual acts whatsoever. Sorry, I know you may be offended by hot guys in various states of shirtlessness and undress, and the naked butt might be racy and NSFW, but it’s not pornography, so get over your prurient nonsense.

I had the same issue with Amtrak, which eventually saw the light and unbanned ALANILAGAN.com from their train service, so I’m hopeful Primark may do the same. (Not that it matters much to anyone else, but if they want me to frequent their store I’d like to see what I’m up to online.)

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Post-Olympic Let-Down Recap

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There’s always a sense of sadness when the Summer Olympics come to a close. More than just the end of an entertaining series of games, it’s also a sign portending the end of summer itself, something that most of us would rather not confront. Oh well, theres no way to go back, except in this recap of the previous week of Olympic glory…

The week began with a rather lackluster Madonna Timeline. ‘Best Night’ was anything but…

Luckily, the Olympics held sway over most of the week’s proceedings, with spotlights on gymnast Eleftherios Petrounias, diver Kristian Ipsen, water polo player Marc Minguell, and diver Philippe Gagné.

This powerful woman may have been my favorite person at this year’s Olympic Games. Oksana Chusovitina gives new meaning to the term ‘champion’ and she showed the world what true Olympic spirit was.

Madonna came back strong and rallied for her birthday.

The garden came back as well, getting its second wind for the last part of the season.

A pair of decathletes: Ashton Eaton and Kevin Mayer.

A tutorial on how to get Tom Daley’s ass.

It’s not easy being green.

Strike a pose.

Albany knows how to pose too.

The Hunk of the Day was also dominated by Olympic hotties, including Bruno Fratus, Soren Thompson, Shawn Barber, Danell Leyva, Epke Zonderland, and Michael Hixon.

Finally, the trio of posts that encapsulated all that was the Rio Summer Olympics 2016: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three.

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Summer Olympics Rio Recap – Part 3

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At the close of the Summer Olympics in Rio, a final recap of the glory and the gorgeousness that comprised the games. Part One was here, and Part Two followed immediately afterward. Part Three offers more of the same: sun, skin, and sporty outfits.

Host country Brazil got the usual host-country boost, thanks to Hunks like Bruno Fratus.

Even if you can’t pronounce his name, you can enjoy the pictorial wonder of Eleftherios Petrounias.

Kristian Ipsen dove to acclaim and accolades.

In some ways (and judging from the featured photos) Rio was all about Tom Daley’s ass, and how to get it.

The sword work of Soren Thompson was impressive.

Spin, spin, sugar: Philippe Gagne.

Continuing his teenage dreamdom, this was Michael Hixon.

Thanks to a pair of silver medals, Danell Leyva finally earned an official Hunk of the Day post.

Water polo Speedo, as worn by Marc Minguell.

The amazing decathlon performance of Ashton Eaton, and runner-up Kevin Mayer.

Connecting us back to the last Summer Olympics was Epke Zonderland, more than worth a second look. 

Finally, my favorite person of all this year’s Olympics was this powerhouse of a woman.

Next up: Tokyo 2020.

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Hunk of the Day: Kyle Snyder

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In the midst of this day recapping the Rio Summer Olympics, a surprise Hunk of the Day post in honor of the USA’s Kyle Snyder winning the gold medal in wrestling. This marks Mr. Snyder’s first Hunk of the Day feature, but based on his growing fanbase it will likely not be his last. Congrats to him on winning the gold, and the Hunkdom. (He’s a ginger to boot, so get the fainting couches ready… and swoon.)

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Summer Olympics Rio Recap – Part 2

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Ahh, the Speedo. All but entirely lost from the swimming competitions, it still finds a happy bulging home amid the divers, and this goes out to them for keeping the grand tradition alive.

Steele Johnson must not have liked the Hunk of the Day honor that was bestowed upon him, as he blocked me on Twitter shortly thereafter. (Like it’s my fault he has a perfectly-porn-ready name!)

His partner David Boudia mostly ignored his Hunk of the Day feature (a wise decision, I admit).

 

British gymnast Brinn Bevan busted out his beautiful form.

Dan Goodfellow won a medal in diving, but his real gift may have been getting to partner with Tom Daley.

One of the openly-gay athletes, Amini Fonua, reminded us that some countries in the world still consider homosexuality a punishable offense.

Matt Anderson showed off his skills with a ball.

A trio of gingers: Christophe HartingGreg Rutherford and Shawn Barber.

Jack Laugher and Chris Mears gave the best hugs.

One of the only ones to beat Michael Phelps, this is Joseph Schooling.

The gymnastic genius of Kohei Uchimura earned him a gold medal.

The Comeback Kid: Anthony Ervin.

The break-out star diver had to be Michael Hixon, who continued to channel Zac Efron in the looks department, and is the stuff of teenage dreams.

Track & field has always been the dullest of the events for me, but even that left me enthralled thanks to gentlemen like LaShawn Merritt.

We dig Diego.

A little recap before the final installation of this Olympic look-back.

More to come…

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Summer Olympics Rio Recap – Part 1

Chris Mears, Jack Laugher

This is the most I’ve ever watched of any Olympic Games, and it all comes to a close tonight. I’m not quite sure what I’ll do with my life until the Winter Games in 2018, but for now we have Rio – and what a wonderful trip it’s been. Things got off to a shiny, sculpted start thanks to the shirtless guy from Tonga.

The record-busting Michael Phelps went out with a gold-medal bang, adding to his compilation of 23 medals, but there were hungry sharks nipping at his heels, including his own country’s brethren.

Nathan Adrian was one of the break-out stars, thanks to his naked booty and extreme tan lines.

Jimmy Feigen was part of a medal-winning relay team (before he got detained).

Adam Peaty was a British gold-medal dream.

Ryan Lochte continued to entertain and charm vandalize and lie, with his light blue hair and indomitable bulge.

Ning Zetao swam for the Chinese team, all with a winning smile.

Chad Le Clos momentarily took on the role of villain as he shadow-boxed in front of a visibly riled Michael Phelps (don’t poke the bear!) before one of their match-ups.

One more swimmer named Ryan ~ Ryan Held.

A bear was on the loose in the form of Nicolai Ceban.

A sexy pair… and a cute pair.

The US Men’s Gymnastics team faltered a bit compared to previous successful outings, but they were no less hunky for it.

Germany had the perfectly-coiffed Marcel Nguyen.

The rest of the world had moves to make and muscles to flex, as seen in the forms of swimmer Marcelo Chierighini, diver Chen Aisen,

Running over the hurdles of sexiness was Devon Allen. (I’m not even sure what that means, just click it.)

A last highlight of this first part: the Zac Efron doppelgänger Michael Hixon, resplendent in a Speedo.

More to come…

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Hunk of the Day: Michael Hixon

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Previously one of the “Olympic Spotlight” features, Michael Hixon now gets his official Hunk of the Day honor, having just stolen the hearts with another springboard performance that had everyone doing double-takes as to whether Zac Efron really was in the Olympic house. (He was, but as a spectator who had come to say hey to Simone Biles.) As for Mr. Hixon, he fills out a Speedo just as well as Mr. Efron could ever hope to do. Congrats to him on this latest achievement.

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A Flash of Albany Beauty

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Sometimes I rush through the day at work so distractedly that I miss the beauty that downtown Albany often affords. As we head into fall, one of the most gorgeous times of the year in upstate New York, I will endeavor to take notice of all the things that once meant so much to me.

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.” ~ Mark Twain

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