Category Archives: Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale

‘The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale’ picks up where it left off – in flights of fancy and fantasy, all pink tulle and voluminous tutu and feathers in one’s hair. This sugar plum ballerina moment is silly and ripe for ridicule, but I learned a valuable lesson from all of it: tights and a tutu do not keep a package warm in the winter. We have reached the point where things may not be all sugary fluff and fun, but it’s not entirely clear yet, so we keep dancing, refusing to look over our shoulders at whatever menace may be lurking. 

If you want something more profound, may you find it in the words below of those far more talented than me. 

“To dance is to be out of yourself. Larger, more beautiful, more powerful. This is power, it is glory on earth and it is yours for the taking.” ~ Agnes De Mille

“A dancer, more than any other human being, dies two deaths: the first, the physical when the powerfully trained body will no longer respond as you would wish. After all, I choreographed for myself. I never choreographed what I could not do. I changed steps in Medea and other ballets to accommodate the change. But I knew. And it haunted me. I only wanted to dance.” ~Martha Graham

“The one important thing I have learned over the years is the difference between taking one’s work seriously and taking oneself seriously. The first is imperative and the second disastrous.” ~ Dame Margot Fonteyn

“Fine dancing, I believe like virtue, must be its own reward. Those who are standing by are usually thinking of something very different.” ~ Jane Austen

“Dance can reveal everything mysterious that is hidden in music, and it has the additional merit of being human and palpable. Dancing is poetry with arms and legs. It is matter, graceful and terrible, animated and embellished by movement.” ~ Charles Baudelaire

“Think of the magic of the foot, comparatively small, upon which your whole weight rests. It’s a miracle, and the dance…..is a celebration of that miracle.” ~ Martha Graham

“If I could tell you what it meant, there would be no point in dancing it.” ~ Isadora Duncan

“So many dancers feel that what they look like is more important than who they are. This is a real danger for dancers who focus for years on appearances and think of themselves as merely a body. The choreographer can’t work with them in the realm of ideas. It’s a huge problem if they haven’t been connecting internally. If they’ve decided that what’s inside is of little value, they can only try to approximate some kind of look. ” ~ Alonzo King

“Dance is for everybody. I believe that the dance came from the people and that it should always be delivered back to the people.” ~ Alvin Ailey

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
6. A Blue-Hued Interlude
7. Fuchsia Fabulousness: Part One. Part Two and Part Three.
8. Bad Boy Bangs – Part One, Part Two. and Part Three.
9. Vanity Under Where: Part One, Part Two. and Part Three.

What is life but a series of poses?

What is a pose but a snapshot of a moment?

What is a moment in the grand scheme of life?

The whooshing rush of a smoke machine – …I see you through the smoky air… – the sparkling light shards of a mirror ball – …I’ll show you every version of yourself… – and the curtain of glittering mylar shimmering in the nightmarish nightclub of dream and fantasy – …so get up on the dance floor! 

“It’s hard to sing and cry.” – Madonna

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
6. A Blue-Hued Interlude
7. Fuchsia Fabulousness: Part One. Part Two and Part Three.
8. Bad Boy Bangs – Part One 

Boomeranging back to this bad-bangs rock-star wannabe scene, ‘The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale’ gives slight whiplash as we give eyeliner and rouge a bad name. The diva may be divine, but she’s also an admitted hot-mess, with the emphasis on the messy. Still, she gives a good time, a chuckle, and sometimes a guffaw. You’ve never had more fun and you know it.

You… [finger-pointing]… you. 

“You’re singing an aria and they’re building scenery in the wings.” – Terrence McNally

“My fire comes from here… It’s mine… It’s not for sale. It’s not for me to give away, and even if I could, I wouldn’t. It’s who I am. Find out who you are.” – Terrence McNally

“This isn’t a freak show. I’m not a performing seal.” – Terrence McNally

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
6. A Blue-Hued Interlude
7. Fuchsia Fabulousness: Part One. Part Two and Part Three.

‘The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale‘ lives up to its ‘All Is Vanity‘ theme with this ridiculous set of photos which features a bad dress, a pair of awful shoes, and the worst wig in the world. Thankfully, the garish and the god-awful are part of what this project was about, and things will get a whole lot uglier before we approach prettiness again. 

In the physical format of this project, the words that accompanied these photos were the lyrics of ‘Glitter and Be Gay’, but those have already been used to greater effect in the earlier stages of this presentation. We needed music then, and a more substantial post, whereas this is but a brief blip better forgotten as soon as possible.

I love the armpit hair, and the push-and-pull tug-of-war between perceived masculine and feminine motifs. That underlying tension gets lost in the funnier aspects at work here. It’s all part of the show, and rather than ruin it by analyzing it to a Virgo’s content, I’ll take my verbal leave and leave you to it. 

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
6. A Blue-Hued Interlude
7. Fuchsia Fabulousness: Part One and Part Two

We pause now in our recent posting schedule of The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale, as the weekend comes to a close, and the Oscars ceremony begins. Looking back at what I was creating twenty years ago has been a conflicting experience, and a large part of why I don’t tend to look back at previous projects, especially those that were made so long ago. Comparison is the ultimate thief of joy, and comparison is undoubtedly the first thing that happens when I look back at these photos. 

It’s not that I suddenly notices the ravages of wear and tear on the body – what a difference 29 is from 49 – it’s that I notice the ravages of wear and tear on the mind. While I certainly miss the lithe form and gray-less hair of my twenties, it’s the mindset and innocence, and the loss of which, that pains me the most. Less the physical trappings and more the mental space that youth affords. 

That said, I would not trade the wisdom and knowledge and acceptance I have learned and earned over the years to go back or return to those days. In that respect, the comparison ultimately ends up being a reassuring one, but that’s not always the case, so I shall continue to warn against comparison as a general rule. 

As for looking back, as long as there are more mildly-amused smiles than justifiable-cringing at all my antics and outfits, I can take it without regret. That is something I will count as a success. The posting of this one will continue this weekend, in the meantime, catch up below:

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
6. A Blue-Hued Interlude
7. Fuchsia Fabulousness: Part One 

The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale delivers a fabulously frivolous dose of style over substance, so I won’t sully this with my excess verbiage. Quentin says it better than I ever could:

“What a stylist needs is glamour – a far more powerful force than mere prettiness. Glamour exists where something not clearly defined seems to be promised but never given.” ~ Quentin Crisp

“I’m talking about flair, style, elan… even the most wretched of us can do something about them.” ~ Quentin Crisp

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
6. A Blue-Hued Interlude

‘Questions in a World of Blue’ would have been the ideal song to accompany this interlude of the Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale – alas, that was already used in this moon-themed post on a lost former-friend. And so we are tasked with the dilemma of finding another blue-themed song to go with this blue-hued interlude. The Blue Danube, Rhapsody in Blue, and Blue Moon – a triumvirate of trite and true blue classics – and all seem too literal, too easy. The Divine Diva Tour is a little more complicated than that, despite what the surface might have you believe. Instead, have a listen to ‘Blue Night’ below, as our interlude brings us further along this fairy’s tale. 

This is the tale of a little boy

who once found wonder everywhere in the world,

but who came to be

Lost in the mirror, enchanted by his own self. 

The embodiment of Narcissus, captivated by his own reflection.

A boy caught up in the superficial, the surface, the appearance of things –

in the ever-shifting kaleidoscope of reflections and images and mirrors – 

always slightly askew and backwards,

reversed and upside down and dizzyingly grand if a little grotesque. 

Nothing was real. All was fantasy,

… no matter how much he was loved…

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.

“Do you know that delicious dreamy feeling when one first wakes on a summer morning, with the twitter of birds in the air, and the fresh breeze coming in at the open window – when, lying lazily with eyes half shut, one sees as in a dream green boughs waving, or waters rippling in a golden light? It is a pleasure very near to sadness, bringing tears to one’s eyes like a beautiful picture or poem.” ~ Lewis Carroll

“To rise and forget, in the sunlight, the ugly dreams that frightened you so when all was dark – to rise and enjoy another happy day, first kneeling to thank that unseen Friend, who sends you the beautiful sun?” ~ Lewis Carroll

“‘Dear, dear!’ How queer everything is today! And yesterday things went on just as usual. I wonder if I’ve changed in the night? Let me think: was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I’m not the same, the next question is, Who in the world am I? Ah, that’s the great puzzle!” ~ Lewis Carroll

“The delight we experience when we allow ourselves to respond to a fairy tale, the enchantment we feel, comes not from the psychological meaning of a tale (although this contributes to it) but from its literary qualities – the tale itself as a work of art.

The fairy tale could not have its psychological impact on the child were it not first and foremost a work of art… As with all great art, the fairy tale’s deepest meaning will be different for each person, and different for the same person at various moments in his life.” ~ Bruno Bettelheim

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One, Part Two and Part Three.

The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale continues in its flight, as our fluttering protagonist dons this iconic purple tulle confection, and prances about the verdant landscape like Maria Von Trapp. This particular setting will come into play again in much more dramatic fashion, but for the moment enjoy this drama-free scene, and all of its fairy-tale elements. 

“When I used to read fairy tales, I fancied that kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one! There ought to be a book written about me, that there ought! And when I grow up, I’ll write one – but I’m grown up now… at least there’s no room to grow up any more.” ~ Lewis Carroll

“While the fantasy is unreal, the good feelings it gives us about ourselves and our future are real, and these real good feelings are what we need to sustain us.” ~ Bruno Bettelheim

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One and Part Two. 

“Life’s a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!” ~ Auntie Mame

While I absolutely adore ‘Auntie Mame’, this quote from the movie had bothered and bugged me on my first few viewings, but I think it’s because I was reading and interpreting it incorrectly. Yes, it’s a great soundbite. It’s clipped and blunt and leaves no room for an easy-follow-up, but it always felt like it went against the anti-elitist theme that Mame so vibrantly espouses for much of the story, as in her refusal to let Patrick be stuffed into rigid social constructs, starting with her eschewing of the Bixby School for a more progressive establishment run by an Acacius Page. 

The reading I prefer to take from it is less a ‘let them eat cake‘ moment and more of a ‘let’s celebrate life’ mantra, which makes much more sense of the context of the ‘Live! Live! Live!’ scene in which it takes place. Mame’s own ‘Live and let live’ lifestyle finds acceptance and celebration of everyone regardless of race, religion, background, or social stratification. 

Such is the theme of the Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale, which wound its way around the continental United States twenty years ago, and is finally finding its posting premiere here, for better and largely worse. Still, it’s a fun look-back when the world could be more concerned with such frivolous things because adults were mostly running the country. Now we must escape to those days for sheer emotional survival, clinging to memories of happier and more carefree times, which is one of the main points of the Divine Diva Tour anyway. It all comes together. 

This fun purple confection of a gown, the beaded headdress, and that saucy necklace comprised the opening outfit of ‘The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale’ as we held a kick-off party in the summer of 2005. It remains one of my favorite looks from all the parties we’ve thrown over the years. 

This particular fairy’s tale is about to take a turn into the dreamier woodland forests of a traditional fairy tale, and those woods are filled with as much enchantment as danger – sometimes I think enchantment only finds full fruition when there is an element of risk to be overcome. There’s something sad in that too. 

For now, we sit before our mirrors and fringed lampshades, waiting to be laced up, hoping for this party to match the excitement and glamour we were promised in all those fairy tales growing up…

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.
5. Purple Puff Confection: Part One 

One of the main tenets of the Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale was its essence of escapism, closely aligned with the unassailable and indefatigable notion of persevering and finding fabulousness in troubled times of seeming hopelessness. While that speaks directly to the tragically historical moment in which we now find ourselves, it’s also something my generation of gay men knows too unfortunately well, especially considering how we weathered the AIDS crisis in the 1980’s. 

There are boys just ripe for some kissin’
And I mean to kiss me a few!
Oh, those boys don’t know what they’re missin’
I’ve got a lot of livin’ to do!

Back then, beneath every layer of sparkle and pizzazz, there was an undercurrent of somber melancholy. Loss accompanied most of our revelries, and death was indelibly intertwined with sexual freedom and abandon. No place, and no one, was safe. Growing up under such a traumatizing umbrella takes a certain toll, and coming of age beneath the specter of those early days of the AIDS epidemic wreaked its own emotional havoc with my development.

And there’s wine all ready for tastin’
And there’s Cadillacs all shiny and new!
Got to move, ’cause time is a wasting
There’s such a lot of livin’ to do!

While our heterosexual counterparts had to concern themselves with pregnancies and STDs, gay men had to contend with the very real possibility that having unprotected sex with our partners of choice might result in our death. If I’ve been a prim and proper Victorian lady in the bedroom at times, it stems in good part from having to be so deliberately careful and cautious at a time when I should have been carefree and a little bit reckless.

What did we do?

We cried – for a country that allowed entire swatch of a vibrant community to die. 

We coped – as best as we could whenever it was sanctioned to condemn and hate us. 

We rallied – literally, physically, mentally, socially.

We fought – for basic rights, for equality, for the opportunity to simply exist without being threatened or attacked or killed.

We danced – when we lost everything, we always had the dance, even if it was just in our memory and minds.

And throughout it all, we did our best to live, sometimes just barely surviving, and sometimes not succeeding. 

There’s music to play, places to go, people to see!
Everything for you and me!
Life’s a ball, if only you know it!
And it’s all just waiting for you!
You’re alive, so go on and show it!
There’s such a lot of livin’ to do!

Whenever I have moments of doubt or uncertainty, when I wonder why I should even bother doing something, I think back to those scary days when AIDS was hovering over all of us, when it felt like all we had was each other. It puts all the silliness and frivolity of life into perspective – and I get a tantalizing glimpse of how ridiculous – and absolutely vital – every little bit of life can be. 

Such a lot of livin’ to do!
What a lot of livin’ to do!

{PS – All apologies for the Republican make-up job.}

~ The Divine Diva Tour: A Fairy’s Tale ~

1. Pink Frilly Fairy: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three
2. Homage to Herb: Part One, Part Two and Part Three
3. A Purple-Hued Interlude
4. Style & Panache: Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part Four.