August arrived almost unbeknownst to me. Without this blog, I lost track of dates and times and schedules, which is fine for some of the summer and some of my days, but I’m a staunch Virgo and I adore a schedule. Part of getting older, however, is in learning to let go of such restrictions, and both last summer and this one have helped in that regard. Sometimes you have to just go with the flow.
Sometimes I lay
Under the moon
And thank God I’m breathing
Then I pray
Don’t take me soon
‘Cause I am here for a reason
Sometimes in my tears I drown
But I never let it get me down
So when negativity surrounds
I know some day it’ll all turn around because…
All my life I’ve been waiting for
I’ve been praying for
For the people to say
That we don’t wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
Our summer party got a fresh spin, and a much-needed revamp in the form of simpler weekends and smaller gatherings for friends whom we hadn’t seen in years. Such intimate get-togethers make for more quality time with the people we love best. Looking back, much of these past few months was about re-connecting with people from the past – Missy and Joe, Anu, Tommy and Janet – these weren’t just friends, they were the friends who had become family to us over the years.
Sitting there around the table, I was instantly transported back two decades, when we’d be sitting around a smaller and dingier table, but no less happy or joyous because of it. Back then, we had all the fun of each other’s company coupled with the hope of whatever futures we would make for ourselves. In the last few years, life has battered us all, and we were in very different places than we were when I used to visit College Avenue in Ithaca. So much had changed, but so much of who we were remained. It was bittersweet – a comfort coupled with a reminder of the relentlessness of time. More than anything else, it reminded me of what was good in this world. I miss that, just being around the people who have always brought such joy into our lives. After the flurry of weddings and births, I worry that only the sorrowful stuff remains. But there are kids to carry on the next cycle, and as they splashed in the pool and ran through the house I realized that I was lucky enough to know some of the brightest hopes for the future. Now that the children are getting older and more self-sufficient, their parents, perhaps, are feeling a first sigh of relief in a long time. A little bit of breathing room. Also, a glimpse of a time when they’re no longer counted on to be there for every single moment, which I imagine is as daunting as it is thrilling. Entering our forties, we all felt a little more weighed down by the world, yet it was impossible to experience anything but elation when we came together. I held onto that for the weekend, and for the summer. There will be dreary fall and winter days when things seem dark and even doomed, but I will keep this summer memory safe within my heart for precisely such days.
One day this all will change
Treat people the same
Stop with the violence
Down with the hate
One day we’ll all be free
And proud to be
Under the same sun
Singing songs of freedom like
One day
All my life I’ve been waiting for
I’ve been praying for
For the people to say
That we don’t wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
{To be continued…}
