This is the sort of night that transforms a warm and pretty autumn into a stark and barren fall. It rips leaves from trees and tidies up brittle, dead branches – a ravaging and potent one-two punch of water and wind, perfectly and naturally designed to bring down all loosely-hanging appendages of beauty. They’re done their summer duty; they know it’s time to release, let go, fall and flutter, and join the ground from whence they came.
One more Halloween song then – a midnight danse macabre, electronic-style – to slide us through to the other world, right when the veil between us is at its thinnest and most penetrable. Enter here…
Escaping the trick-or-treaters and leaving Andy to fend for himself (he ended up sleeping through it) I sit in a nearby coffee-shop enjoying the cafe culture. Aside from this loose sketch of a blog post, I’m mostly just scrolling through the phone when I suddenly remember the need for a proper scent for an upcoming early screening of ‘Wicked: For Good‘ on November 17. One of the scents that Cynthia Erivo herself reportedly wore during the filming of the movies, ‘Witchy Woo’ sounded ideal on more than one level, so I ordered a bottle blindly. It won’t arrive until next week, so it misses Halloween completely, but should get here just in time for the return of our Wicked Witches.
All you sick, twisted fucks celebrating this pagan day of sin and darkness, precisely when the veil between the physical world and the spiritual world is at its thinnest, would do well to remember that this day, this holiday, is amateur hour for those of us who turn out an extraordinary wardrobe nightly. That run-on sentence is my way of not-so-pleasantly reminding everyone who gives the slightest shit (all three of you who read this blog, and whom I should probably treat a lot better) that Halloween is traditionally my day off.
Happy Halloween to all who celebrate! As for the rest of us, it’s almost over – and the real holidays are about to begin. I hear Mariah squealing already…
When you realize that you stand entirely alone in a world that celebrates togetherness, you cannot help but feel forever out of place and at odds with any environment in which you find yourself. When you feel out of place or alienated from your own family, that’s a whole other level of trauma.
Unique, that’s what you are Stilettos kicking vintage crystal off the bar Category bad bitch, I’m the bar (ooh) Alien superstar, whip, whip
Andy recently said that he’s always sort of felt like an alien in his family, and at that moment I understood exactly what he meant, as well as why we get along so well; with such a shared experience we understand things in the other without having to voice it or figure it out – we simply get it, and it’s something that people who have always belonged will never understand. It’s a loneliness, a strength, and a way of survival that sets us slightly apart from most people with more functional family units.
And this isn’t an indictment or criticism of our respective family units – merely an observation, a way in which we have always felt like the outsiders, and a valuable component in finding sanctuary with each other. It’s also made us stronger and better people; when you have to forge your own family, without children or traditional ties, you develop methods of emotional survival that put other trials and tribulations to shame. We have to be strong that way, because we will grow old without the support of kids, and that’s a daunting concept for most people. For now we have each other, and there’s home enough in that.
We learned long ago, from pain inflicted both purposely and inadvertently, that we could only count on ourselves. It should also be noted here that just because we can take care of ourselves doesn’t mean we don’t deserve as much love and support as those who can’t. Alas, that’s not the way the world works, and love sometimes has an unfortunate way of flowing along the easiest path.
Masterpiece genius, drip intravenous Patty cake on that wrist Tiffany Blue billboards over that ceiling (unique) We don’t like plain Always dreamed of paper planes Mile high when I rodeo, then I come down and take off again (unique)
For my part, I subconsciously went about conjuring ways to be as enthralling and captivating as possible to prove my own worth, especially when those closest to me couldn’t be bothered. Andy forged his ways as well, and happily we met in time to create a life together for the last twenty-five years.
You see pleasure in my glare Look over my shoulder and you ain’t scared The effects you have on me when you stare Head on a pillow, hike it in the air
“Another thing I learned in therapy?… The kids in dysfunctional families who act out and rebel are the ones who are the healthiest mentally. They’re the ones who see that something’s wrong. That’s why they act out, because they see the house is burning down, and they’re screaming for help. That was you.” ~ Meg Shaffer
I got pearls beneath my legs, my lips, my hands, my hips (U-N-I-Q-U-E) I got diamonds beneath my thighs where his ego will find bliss Can’t find an ocean deep that can’t compete with this cinnamon kiss (U-N-I-Q-U-E) Fire beneath your feet, music when you speak, you’re so unique Unique, that’s what you are Lingerie reflecting off the mirror on the bar Category sexy bitch, I’m the bar Alien superstar
“At some point in the life of every scapegoat, the clock will strike the midnight hour, the masks will come off, and the aggression of family will reveal itself.” ~ M. Wakefield
Passing the match test? That’s some kind of tease, because everything rests on the moment the little flame sees Let’s go boom boom in the zoom zoom room
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tM2FJZfRV4
If you get past that brief little flash, take down my number with your pencil moustache Play truth or dare in the light of a strike anywhere Don’t follow the fallen already lying down there
This lighting is like hell, behind curtains, beaded fringe, sumptuous and opulent… pure hell.
A French sort of desire, held captive in a birdcage, hot like neon, frigid like nitrogen… hellfire.
The way the face is lit by a flame…
When we trip the light fantastic, a feeling so rare, it will follow your features aligned by the glare Let’s go boom boom in the zoom zoom room Let’s go boom boom in the zoom zoom room
I don’t claim to have the answers, particularly regarding a visual riddle like this, where the interpretations – wild and varied and unfettered – reveal more of the viewer than the one who captured the image. A shift in focus – welcome and new – will keep this site from stagnating, and as I contemplate and loosely plot out another year of this nonsense, I like such a shift.
Mercury is once again in wretched retrograde motion, and I am so over it already I can’t even deal. On my way to the cafe where I’ve been writing lately, a traffic jam around that stupid traffic circle near the Colonie library (the circle should have been installed at the goddamned Crossings intersection) we paused for a few minutes going nowhere.
Above, I noticed a large bird circling, widely at first, then tighter and tighter. Initially I thought it was a blue heron, which was sometimes at the little library pond, but as it turned its head I saw the distinct white crest and white tail feathers of a bald eagle.
A majestic sight, and a reminder that at our most frustrated and annoyed, we should pause to take in our surroundings, to be mindful and present, so as not to miss anything, especially out of anger. Easier said than done, the lesson of this bald eagle is a powerful one – from a powerful totem animal – and I felt grateful to be in its wondrous presence.
After traffic resumed moving, I came upon a car accident on Wolf Road, backing things up further, but my mind was quieter then, and I was able to reach the cafe before the police arrived to shut the shit down.
Then it was the early evening of cafe culture until the streets cleared, and I finished this post.
He’s just been christened the Sexiest 40 Year Old by People Magazine, and he’s been here previously when we used to have a Hunk of the Day feature – today Derek Hough gets crowned Dazzler of the Day for making a name for himself in the world of dance and entertainment. Currently a judge on ‘Dancing With The Stars‘, Hough is still performing, dancing, inspiring, and yes, Dazzling.
It’s a treacherous slide until winter begins and we head in the other direction, and while that still feels rather far off, it’s the next season in line, and not as far as it seems.
One day I hope to spend a number of retirement days here, enjoying the light, studying it more closely when all I’ll have is time. It’s the one thing that proves elusive on my quick weekends away. Still, I must make room for it, as no tomorrow is ever promised with absolute certainty.
The days won’t be as vibrant or sunny as this for quite some time, and I’ll never get accustomed to their departure – the way the sky drains of color, the way the sun loses its potency, the way the greens will just gradually fade until they disappear completely beneath a blanket of snow.
I’m jumping ahead – something we shouldn’t do when fall is still aflame… as on the bricks of a former church.
I was there to witness Candice’s inner business She wants the boys to notice Her rainbows and her ponies She was educated But could not count to ten Now she got lots of different horses By lots of different men
Halloween songs should be catchy and simple – it’s part of their potency. This bop by Robbie Williams is pure aural candy, sweet and sticky and bad for you in the best ways.
Hey, oh, here she goes Either a little too high or a little too low Got no self-esteem and vertigo ‘Cause she thinks she’s made of candy Hey, oh, here she goes Either a little too loud or a little too close Got a hurricane at the back of her throat She thinks she’s made of candy
Adam Brody earns his first crowning as Dazzler of the Day thanks to a compendium of work that runs the gamut from ‘The O.C’ to his latest work in ‘Nobody Wants This’, for which he’s already been nominated for a Golden Globe, Emmy and Critics’ Choice Award. Add in film work for ‘Mr. and Mrs. Smith’, ‘Thank You For Smoking’, ‘Jennifer’s Body’, ‘Shazam’ and ‘Promising Young Woman’ among many others and you have the combustible talent and curriculum vitae that Dazzlers are made of.
“Fashion has always been a vocabulary for me, a way to express myself to you and to myself. The artistic practice of fashion is a daily act of self invention. An opportunity open to every one of us to recognize a garment as a paintbrush on the canvas of self. We are, each of us, the art of our own design.” ~ Jordan Roth
Fashion impresario Jordan Roth earns his very first Dazzler of the Day crowning thanks to that impeccable sense of cutting-edge style and brilliant genre-smashing courage. The substance behind the outrageous style is found in his Tony-winning theatrical accomplishments as producer, in shows such as ‘The Book of Mormon’, ‘Spring Awakening’ and ‘American Idiot’. Check out his impressive website here, along with all its wondrous portals for more.
Having just returned from a cozy weekend with a dear friend in Connecticut, I’m happily spent from warm emotions, lots of laughter, and loads of fun. More on that when I have a moment – for now, a quick look back in our usual Monday-morning weekly blog recap… what HAVE you missed?
Instagram censored an old photo, so somebody’s been going through my back-issues and for their peace of mind I wish they would just get off my jock. (The hits were appreciated, however, and October looks to be the most popular month for this little blog in years.)
