What I Learned in the Garden Today


After two full-days in the garden – heaving and moving four cubic yards of mulch (that’s a freaking lot), transplanting and repositioning certain plants, amending and pruning others, my body and brain are both fried. I’m a little apprehensive of what tomorrow morning will bring after everything I did to my physical being this weekend, but it’s a good kind of pain. For now. And it was not without its rewards in wisdom. Here are a few choice notions that crossed my mind over the past two days in the garden:

  • If I ever write that gay garden porn memoir/guide to life I’ve long threatened, it shall be titled ‘I Should Have Worn Knee-pads.’
  • In a pinch, it is possible to steer a wheelbarrow with one hand and one hip, for emergency wiping of sweat off the brow (and it doubles as good by-stander entertainment too).
  • When push comes to shove, and there’s dirt on the glove, you can push your glasses up with your elbow.
  • Mucus is NASTY after you’ve been breathing in tiny dirt particles all day.


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