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13 December 2025
Tags: Holiday
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Holiday Card 2025: The Hardest Card I’ve Ever Shot

After three decades of shooting these holiday photo cards, you’d think I’d have the process down pat, but this year’s image(s) turned out to be the hardest card I’ve ever shot. For a fifty-year-old man with way more salt than pepper in his hair, I was happy and relieved to see that I can still rise to the occasion when called. The images here are a hat-tip and nod to the provocative past, a timely wink to our selfie/dick-pic-obsessed current culture, and a cheeky testament to the 30th anniversary of my very first holiday card pic.

Intended to be both trendy and timeless, this card is hopefully everything you expected, dreaded, and wished for from the questionable depths of my creative prowess – equal parts amusing, offensive, inflammatory, ridiculous, porny, obscene, silly, grotesque, colorful, wonky, wanky, and wildly un-Christian. The very best of Christmas past, present, and future to come, with enough innuendo to erect the highest of holiday spirits.

Speaking of erecting things, this isn’t the first time my North pole has held up a Santa’s hat in service of a holiday card – somewhere around 1999 there was a photo card that featured a fully-naked body shot save for the iconic hat hung only by all that nature gave me – a card that has since been lost to time (and if ever I dig it up I’ll add it to the pantheon).

As for a few behind-the-scenes tidbits out of which you may get your own rise and chuckle, test shots for this year’s image were conducted on a birthday trip to Boston with Suzie, who had no real idea of what was going on behind the closed bedroom door, and who wouldn’t have batted an eyelash even if she had. That original concept had a full body and face shot, with Santa hats on both heads – the first working title being ‘A Hat for Every Head‘, but my body was not quite fit for such a full reveal, and my artistic eye wasn’t happy with such a blatant display when good erotica is all about seduction and mystery; it all fell a little limp until I played around with things in the following days, in which this more coy concept firmed up, giving a bigger hint and some mystery for the viewer to spin their own holiday fantasy about what happens when the hat comes off.

Hard copies (pun absolutely intended) of this card were mailed out December 9, 2025, and scented with ‘Overture’ by Amouage – a boisterous oud-heavy stomper designed to be as potentially off-putting and repellant as the card itself. That’s how we’ve rolled for thirty years ~ Happy Holidays!

Previous Holiday Photo Cards Through the Years:

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