It was during the mid-20th-century when something termed the ‘Lavender Scare’ was spreading across our great country. A ‘moral panic’ about homosexuality resulted in thousands of gay employees being fired or forced to resign from government employment. Branding gay employees as a national security risk due to the ignorant idea that we could be vulnerable to blackmail didn’t happen that long ago, and it doesn’t feel far-fetched at this present moment to think of something similar happening again. Look at all the persecution, threats, and violence that trans people face, some of it supported by the politicians in power.
I lost myself on a cool damp night
Gave myself in that misty light
Was hypnotized by a strange delight
Under a lilac tree…
Back then, the Lavender Scare provided an atmosphere to persecute gay people through government-sanctioned homophobia. Again, such an atmosphere feels very much in effect today, and the blatant homophobia, racism, and hypocritical hatred of certain groups of people is celebrated and heralded by the MAGA-run GOP, and emboldened by a tepid and weak media.
I made wine from the lilac tree
Put my heart in its recipe
It makes me see what I want to see
Be what I want to be
Rather than repeat the Lavender Scare in these parts, this spring’s theme is a treacherous turnabout of the idea. This shall be the spring of the Lilac Scare – our own personal rising up against all the hate that once fomented the Lavender Scare, turning anything and everything on its head that might in any way be an attack on the LGBTQ+ community and its allies. The Lilac Scare is not some moral panic about the dangers of homosexuality – it’s a panic about the complete absence of morals in those attacking us – a panic about the hypocrisy of hate disguised as religion. This is a panic that will be instigated by the people who have been condemned and stomped on for so long that we are fed up and fighting back.
When I think more than I want to think
Do things I never should do
I drink much more than I ought to drink
Because it brings me back you
This Lilac Scare Spring will be about the pretty, pastel, prim and proper lilac too, but do not be fooled by it perfumed beauty. People forget, or simply neglect to realize in the first place, how incredibly hardy the lilac is, how indestructible they can be with some lasting well beyond a century. They refuse to acknowledge lilac’s diabolical insistence on surviving and thriving and delivering magic and fragrant wonder every spring. They ignore the insidious way its shoots and suckers gradually strangle out a well-manicured lawn, and the stalwart, gnarled trunks each tree eventually develops as proof of its tenacity and testament to its endurance. They pretend away lilac’s ancient history, how it refuses to yield to time the way all of us must at some point do. They underestimate lilac’s power and potency, fooled by the sweet flowers and how seemingly benign they be in their fleeting duration.
Lilac wine is sweet and heady like my love
Lilac wine, I feel unsteady like my love
Listen to me, I cannot see clearly
Isn’t that he coming to me nearly here?
They forget that lilac can be a lethal poison flower – not in any literal sense, we drink the lilac wine without harm, don’t we? – but in the way lilac calls to and captures those who happen upon its perfume, who sniff it thinking it’s such harmless stuff. Lilac enthralls with nostalgic childhood memory, spinning a sweet spider-web-like strand of silk that seductively pulls us back in time to happier, more carefree moments, lulling us with endless sentences and songs from our youth, and leading us to believe with exquisitely mesmerizing fashion that all is hope, all is possible, all is beautiful, and all is spring.
And then, sooner than its blooms turn to brown, sooner than its beauty begins to decay, lilac snatches it all away.
Ruthless.
Brutal.
Galvanizingly brilliant in the cruelest way imaginable.
Precisely that for which the present moment is so desperately clamoring.
Lilac wine is sweet and heady, where’s my love?
Lilac wine, I feel unsteady, where’s my love?
Listen to me, why is everything so hazy?
Isn’t that he, or am I goin’ crazy, dear?
Lilac sees your war, has seen your wars for centuries, and lilac knows how you are only sending your children to their deaths. Lilac sees your history, has seen your history for centuries, and lilac knows how your history is one of hate. Lilac sees all that you are doing, and all that you aren’t, in your silence, in your complicity, in your turning another blind eye to the deplorable criminals around you. Lilac offers its pretty perfume, its pretty flowers, and lets you have its beauty for only a moment, fooling you into thinking things will be all right, that things aren’t the bad, that spring will always come again. But lilac knows… and so do we.
This Lilac Scare shall be retribution for the Lavender Scare. We’re better than you, we’re stronger than you, and we no longer fucking care. I’m ready for the fight, I’m ready for the battle, I’m ready for the war to end the hate once and for all. Above all else, I’m ready for the love – the love that dares to speak its unabashed name for the entire world to hear. Love that has yet to be vanquished. Love that has yet to be defeated. Love – and only love – that shall last.
Lilac Wine, I feel I’m ready for my love
Feel I’m ready for my love
