Alan Ilagan

I didn’t get to see her acceptance speech for Best Song (“Masterpiece”), but I did hear that several people thought she was narcissistic and arrogant. Well, duh. It’s Madonna, and she’s entitled. And as Matthew Rettennmund rightfully points out, she never wins anything, so I’m forgiving most of what she may have said.

Let’s talk, instead, about the dress. While I think it’s lovely enough, it feels like she settled for an in-between version of a full-blown ball gown (which I would have loved) and something far simpler. The diamonds do brighten it all up, though I have mixed feelings about the cross. Still, the whole effect is passably pretty, but once again I yearn, perhaps unfairly, for something more.

I like when she goes daring and edgy (as in her dramatic canary Olivier Theyskens gown, woefully under-appreciated at the 1998 VH-1 Fashion Awards, her brilliant bunny-eared Louis Vuitton ensemble at the 2009 Met Gala, or the glorious John Galliano get-up of the Evita premiere in 1996 – my favorite red-carpet look of all-time), and this one seemed to play it just a little safe – albeit in a gorgeous way

It’s a nice soft set-up for what she’s going to wear for her next high-profile appearances: the Superbowl and the Oscars (assuming she attends the latter). I hope she removes the half-gloves before they become a sad trademark, or opts for a full-length formal version a la the Golden Globes of 1996, or the bombshell Marilyn Monroe-homage at the Oscars in 1991. Love it or hate it, the world is once again talking about Madonna. She wins.

This is Madonna looking classy, elegant, and gorgeous in Stella McCartney at the “Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty” Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art. I honestly didn’t think she could top the bunny-ear Louis Vuitton red carpet moment (which I absolutely adored) but I think she managed to do so with this. It’s just so sumptuous, with just the right amount of sparkle, and she wears it so well.

I especially love the neckline and necklace combination – it’s soft and seductive, and just the right amount of sexy.

There is no other Queen.
Long may she reign.

Simply amaze-balls.

Being that this is the only kind of shopping I can afford these days, it helps when one has good windows to browse, such as the ones at Copley Place. Above is one of the efforts put forth by Neiman Marcus.

Even better than NM, I’ve found the Louis Vuitton showcases rarely disappoint, and it’s nice to be able to check out the latest bags and clothing without getting the once-twice-thrice over by wary sales associates and store guards.

Yet as fine as Neiman and Louis may be, their window treatments will always pale in comparison to Tiffany’s. I still recall the very first window set that ever made an impression on me, at this very same location many years ago. I was just a kid, and could barely see high enough to take it all in, but I got enough. The diamonds featured were just another almost-hidden aspect to the work of art that each window conveyed – in that case a snowy winter scene rendered with a few key images, and highlighted by the wintry sparkle of the jewels. It was one of my first realizations of beauty. The single spot of light illuminating a tiny jewel, backed by shifting shades of blue – the sky in the morning, the sky at night – branches delicately lined with snow, silhouetted lines of random yet contained chaos – all encapsulated behind a single square pane of glass and buffeted by buffed granite.

As commercial as it may have been, as designed as it no doubt was to subliminally sell me something I could not afford, there was no denying the artistry and gorgeousness of the scenes my young eyes were beholding. I still think of those Tiffany windows – they haunt me with their beauty, their light, their enchantment. It was a bewitching moment – and that’s the feeling and emotion most artists spend a lifetime seeking to conjure. The elusive apple of our eye, opening up skies of wonder, new worlds away…

Yes Santa, I’ve been a very good boy this year (and I’m one of the only people on earth going to work this Friday), so let’s cut the unnecessary pleasantries and get down to business: here is my Christmas Wish List. Some are out-of-reach, but if you don’t ask you’ll never receive. And Oprah, if you’re reading this, feel free to send a non-studio-audience member some love too.

I’m not even going to bother padding the first item, with the hope that everything that follows will be viewed as more reasonable. This is the Bottega Veneta quilted leather briefcase, which originally retails for $2580 but is currently on sale at Bluefly here for $2064.

* Next up is this iPhone cover from InCase – a much more plausible request, and a perfect stocking stuffer. Entitled the “Metallic Monochrome Slider” for the iPhone 3 and 3GS, the purple version is the one that would work well with so many of my outfits. At $34.95 there is no reason not to get online here and order immediately.

In the functional column (but still sleek and stylish) is this chic USB Flash drive from LaCie – I’d love the 16 GB version. It even fits on a key chain, and can be found here, along with a number of neat storage gadgets.

* Christmas is not Christmas without a new cologne, so I’m going out a limb and requesting the fragrance Outrageous! by Frederic Malle from Barneys. I love anything that has an exclamation point as part of its name (with the glaring exception of Joop!) It runs $110 for a bottle, but money is always well-spent on cologne, stationary, and luggage. It too is available online here.

How could I leave off a shoe request? I can’t, so here it is. A simple pair of Kenneth Cole New York Mountain Bike lace-up boots, in black leather, at Zappos here. Originally $195, they’ve been marked down to $156.

And finally, ending on an out-there note, is this Louis Vuitton Monogram travel case, to the giver of which I would offer a lifetime of indentured servitude. On a practical note, this would be perfect for carrying my lunch to work, and it would save all those plastic bags and be a wonderful way to go green. On a less practical note, it’s $4010, but I’ll take the smaller version in a pinch. See LouisVuitton.com.

* Asterisk denotes an item that is a priority, as well as those that won’t break the bank. In other words, there is no excuse not to see these under the tree come Christmas Eve.

I usually get a hefty tax return because I get to claim the house or something, and this year was no different. My friend Marline does my taxes, for which I take her out for a nice lunch. Again, this year will prove no different. What is notable is that, factoring in the price of lunch, this year’s return is exactly the price of this Louis Vuitton Monogram Canvas Coffret Tresor  that I’ve been eyeing for over a year - right down to the dollar.

I think you know the dilemma here. Obviously, there is a cosmic sign that should not be ignored, because when you ignore the gentle nudge of the universe bad things invariably happen. It’s pretty clear that this hard-sided bit of Louis luggage was just meant to be carried into my wedding suite in someone’s white-gloved hands (I don’t care if I have to wear the white gloves myself).

The practical side of me knows that almost all of this tax return has already been earmarked for wedding expenses pending on my American Express card, and despite my devil-may-care front, at heart I’m a responsible adult, whose head may often be in the clouds, but whose non-Louis-clad feet are decidedly on the ground.

One Louis will have to do. (At least until the next tax return.)

On a much lighter note than the previous post, while revisiting the past at my parents the other evening, I thought back to some of the best Christmas gifts I received as a boy. It shouldn’t require much explanation nor suspension of belief to hear that I did not ask for typical toy cars or video-games or sports paraphernalia that some boys might want.

I had my heart set on unicorns and dolls and strange exotic creatures. I wanted stardust and glitter and marabou boas. I wanted lava lamps and chemistry sets and lightning in a glass globe. Yet for all the items on my lists over the years, it was usually the ones I didn’t ask for that I enjoyed the most.

The very first gift I can actually remember is a record player. I seem to recall Mom going out on Christmas Eve and all of us wondering where she had gone, then returning a short time later with a record player, and suddenly the house was filled with music. That night it was Christmas carols, but soon we’d be listening to Peter, Paul, and Mary and the soundtrack to ‘The Magic Garden’ – a children’s show that I loved.

A few years later, I ran downstairs on Christmas morning to find a package that was as tall as me. Tearing open the wrapping, I found a chalkboard, which I instantly adored – pretending to teach lessons, writing in chalk, and wiping it off like I was at school. I thought it was the coolest thing.

The other Christmas I remember was mostly due to the combination of gifts my brother and I received rather than any one particular item. We each got a stuffed E.T. toy, as well as a little house/fort that we could stay inside and close off to the world. A few books were also part of that Christmas, and I distinctly remember laying down in our little house and trying to read ‘The Unicorn and the Serpent’ which was just beyond my grasp. The pictures were both exciting and scary, with a terrifying serpent that seemed to have the upper hand until the end. I stayed in that little house much longer than my brother, who easily lost interest in such staid occupations as reading, but even alone there I loved the moment.

In recent years Andy has done an admirable job of surprising me with his choices – a Bulova watch, a new camera – things that I didn’t even realize I wanted until I got them. As obnoxiously materialistic as I often feign to be, it’s always been the thought that mattered most.

There were far more expensive gifts that I would ask for and receive (a laser-disc player so I could play Madonna’s Blonde Ambition Tour, a Louis Vuitton Keepall 50) but the ones I cherished the most were those unexpected gifts that only the people who loved me most could know that I wanted. It’s a touching affirmation that someone noticed after all.

This is one of Steven Klein’s photos for Madonna’s upcoming Dolce & Gabbana campaign. While I normally champion just about everything she does, there are moments when I simply can’t get behind her. (Her collaboration with Gap, the second part of her Louis Vuitton ads, the shoddy efforts she put into every Greatest Hits album after The Immaculate Collection… to name but a few.) Of this preview pic (and the others I’ve seen, which show her doing mundane things like washing dishes, peeling fruit, and eating spaghetti with her bare hands) I’m a bit on the fence.

I went to Matt, my main go-to-guy when it comes to all things Madonna, and he seemed to be embracing them, so I’m giving them another chance, but my initial gut reaction was one of disappointment. I guess I was expecting some sort of ultra-glamourous scene when Dolce & Gabbana were involved. I get the concept here of turning that on its head, I’m just not sure I like it as much as I’ve liked previous work she’s done (like her first Versace campaign). I also feel like we’ve seen her do this sort of juxtaposition before – as in feeding the chickens in a dress and heels, or standing before a dirty Argentinean industrial site in formal white gloves and gown.

I will reserve final judgment until I see the ad campaign when it hits magazines. Until then, I remain unimpressed.